Boing Boing

The Rubber Rollercoaster indeed - every high higher, every low lower and in between you ping between them.

The Ups: Got a whole new batch of cds from ebay today (this being the summertime splurge from last weekend when I seemed to have the music midas touch and won everything) so am having a rip-fest this evening.

The Downs: Just when am I going to actually listen to them all!

The Ups: Am going out with my fantastically witty and fun sister tomorrow. Due to same family stuff over the last few months, we've got really close and ended up finding out that we are very similar in a host of ways - I already knew we sounded the same, laughed pretty much the same but we've both got the same magpie tendency for darting after things, both seem to have the ability to make others laugh even when we are feeling like scum ourselves. And we both have the self confidence of a slug at times. But she is great.

The Downs: The reason I'm going out with her is that we're are both going through a tough time (for vastly different reasons) at the moment and we have had enough! So although it's going to fun seeing her, because we are both slightly at the froot-loop edge of reality at the moment, there is a lot of poignacy to why we spend time together. I wish that I could take some of her hurt away, she has enough stress stocked up to easily replace it.

The Ups: Got stuff done at work, loads of it, stuff that needed doing as part of the reports frenzy that is part of my job, gave me that content feeling of control.

The Downs: Arghhhh! The uncertainty at work is crippling. I am someone that naturally wants to help others, support my colleagues, be strong for them and provide clarity etc etc. Well fat chance of that at the moment. I'm lurching from feeling totally despondent due to the inability to plan anything since I haven't a clue what's going to happen to euphoric as I think of all the opportunities this is going to offer. The vile reality is somewhere in the middle - there will be a whole load of work coming our way and it will be more of the same.

More Downs: This is now contributing to insomnia meaning that not only am I truly manic, I'm shagged as well. Please don't suggest I need a break - holidays are a sore subject.